families are forever – Stephanie Richey Art

Church

I love Sundays, and the older I get the more I have decided that it is my favorite day of the week, mainly because I love Church. When I was a kid and throughout my teenage years however, I went to Church not for the Spiritual uplift, but for the social aspect. Being raised in Utah, a lot of the social activities I participated in revolved around Church activities anyway. But as I have gotten older, my perspective of what Church is, and why I go has changed.

As a teenager I never felt invincible like many teenagers feel, but I felt like I was pretty knowledgeable, pretty set on the right path, and that I was pretty much right in most of what I did. I did try to listen to my parents and be obedient, but I felt like, as an all-around person, I was doing alright. I rarely struggled with doubt within myself and have always been a pretty happy person.

First, let me say, I still am a pretty happy person, almost all the time. I feel like that is not a state of being, rather a choice that we make each and every day. It’s how we choose to look at life. But, as I have had children and had lots of, I guess, “adult” things happen in life, like we all do, there are days when I need help, strength. I find that strength most often at Church through the Gospel of Jesus Christ, as well through my daily scripture study and prayer. Sunday’s have become a day of rejuvenation, rest, a time to be filled and prepare again for the coming week.

I remember when my kids were small, and we would prepare to go to Church. It was always hectic and crazy getting everyone out the door. My husband usually had a calling that took him to Church earlier than me, so I had to get myself and 4 kids ready to go. There were weeks that if I hadn’t understood the lift that I get, I would have thrown the towel in and stayed home. But I knew that I needed to be there, and I knew that I would leave Church with an added inner strength that would help me get through the coming week. It never failed, I always left more at peace, and better prepared for my coming week.

Many people in today’s society are drifting away from religion and church attendance of any kind. Many say that being out in the outdoors is just as good, or that spending time with family or friends instead of attending Church is a better way to spend Sunday’s. Being outside is definitely rejuvenating, I love being outside in nature and in the fresh air, it’s rejuvenating to my mind and body, but not quite the same way as the Gospel rejuvenates my soul. I love spending time with my family, more than just about anything else. One of my favorite parts of spending time with my family is the joy they bring me. But that joy is often fleeting, only lasting until the family jumps into the week and their busy lives, not that the joy of family disappears, but things get hectic and chaotic during the week. The joy that I feel through learning the word of God at Church, and the Spirit that attends that learning continues to fill me during the week and helps me remember in all those chaotic moments what is really important, how much I love my family even when they frustrate me, and that my family is eternal. There is a peace that permeates every aspect of my life, that I can’t get anywhere else.

Church for me is not just another thing to check off my list every week, but a necessity to keep me going. Sometimes I go and look for others to help, or ways to lift. Other times I go looking for relief. But either way, I know that when I leave, I will have been filled, lifted, and prepared for whatever challenges I may encounter in the upcoming week. I know that I can leave there with peace that will stay with me, a peace that isn’t achievable except through the Lord.

Calling

I was pondering today about the different callings that I have had in my Church. I belong to the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. In our Church we receive callings from our Bishop, who is the head of our ward, and who also was called to do his job. We serve for a time, no specific time per se, although some callings have a general timeframe that you can kind of count on. We believe that the callings come from our Heavenly Father, and I know that as I have faithfully served in my callings, I have been blessed with inspiration not only to do my job, but in my own personal life as I have served others in the capacity that I have been asked to serve. It’s amazing how the Lord is mindful of us as a whole as well as individuals and blesses us in any and all efforts that we put forth to follow Him and help in any capacity whether it be our calling or not.

I have had many callings in different areas of my Church, working with the adult sisters in Relief Society, working with the youth through the Young Women’s program as well as through the Sunday School and Seminary programs, working with the Primary children in many capacities. All of these callings have stretched me, taught me, and helped me in so many other aspects of my life. From organizing large events, to confidence in helping in the school system through volunteering and substitute teaching, to playing the piano for school concerts, and so much more.

But there has been one calling that I have had more regularly throughout my time as an adult than any other calling. Primary Pianist. Even when I have other callings, I still have had the opportunity to play the piano for the primary children. There have been times when I have loved this calling, and times when I have really wished I could do something different. We are not required to stay in any specific calling, if we need to be released, we can ask to be, but I know how hard it is to find people to help, and primary pianist is especially difficult as not too many people play the piano to begin with, so I try to be willing to serve wherever I am needed.

Today as I thought about this opportunity over the years, I am grateful. I have grown to love the songs the Primary children sing, and the lessons they teach these kids in a fun way. They learn about who they are – Children of God, where they lived before they came here, where they are going when their time here is finished, and how to live a good life. They also learn about the beauty of this earth, and why it was created, that God loves them and is waiting to help them through good times and hard times, and that families are not only important, but central to God’s plan for us, not only in this life, but in all of eternity. Music is an interesting thing, it can bring the Spirit when it is good uplifting music, or it can drive the Spirit away leaving us feeling dark and unsettled depending on the type of music we listen to.

Today is no exception. I have the opportunity to play the piano and listen to these kids sing. I am grateful today as well, that the opportunity to play so frequently reminds me on a regular basis the importance of practicing! I love music, I love playing, but sometimes life gets busy, and I forget to practice. So, to conclude today’s blog, I will share with you several of my favorite primary songs.

I Am a Child of God

My Heavenly Father Loves Me

Families Can Be Together Forever

Family

This week members of my Church all over the world have been studying in Genesis about Isaac and Rebekah, as well as Jacob and Esau. As I have studied about these great people I have also studied about family and the importance of marriage and children. I believe that marriage and family was ordained of God before the world was, and that it is essential not only to our eternal salvation, but here on earth it is also essential to holding our communities and countries together. It is the most important entity that exists on earth, above any government or institution that has ever existed. I also believe that protection of the family is the most important thing governments can do to create a healthy society.

No family is going to be perfect however, because we are all imperfect human beings. But there are some things that I think make a huge difference in family life and help to maintain not only a good core family at home, but when children leave home, helps to keep extended families together as well as helps our children create good homes where the family unit can thrive, even when none of us are perfect. Today I will tell you about several of my favorites.

Family dinners together are super important. Well, a family meal together every day. Some families are super busy in the evening, going every which way with work and activities, so maybe it’s breakfast together. But a meal together where everyone can sit down and just talk. No particular subject, just be together in a relaxed and safe environment where everyone can share their thoughts. My husband and I have also found that this is a great place to discuss concerns the kids may have, and often, the answers come from siblings rather than us as parents. This helps to keep the bonds between siblings strong as they realize they can help each other as much as we as parents can help.

Taking time to teach values. This is something that has really gone by the wayside in a lot of instances. Parents are relying more and more on schools to teach values, but that is not the school’s purpose. Kids should come to school with some basic values that are inherently human, like how to be kind, how to share, how to say sorry and take accountability for actions. These are things that every human being should be learning at home at a very early age. This obviously takes a concerted, conscientious effort on the part of parents to teach, but it doesn’t take a lot of time, it can happen naturally in every day situations.

Involving our kids in activities in the community is a great way to strengthen family bonds. I know that sounds really weird, because it’s not at home. But the key is to be involved as parents as well. If your kids love basketball, go and watch them play, volunteer to help with the concessions or stand at the gate. Let them know that what they find important, you find important too. Encourage the other siblings to go. My oldest loved basketball. My second child doesn’t particularly care for basketball, or any sport. But we required her to go and support her sister periodically. She would go and read, or at least we thought she was reading the whole time, until she would comment on a bad Ref call, or talk to her sister about a particular player during the game. Keeping them each involved in each other’s personal lives keeps those family bonds strong and diversifies each child’s outlook on life. One may be so focused on basketball that they never looked at any other sport until a sibling started rock climbing or some other new interest, and all of a sudden everyone has benefited by having their knowledge expanded because of something new.

Time. I have often heard that love in family life is spelled T I M E. Making time for just your family is critical. We like to set aside Monday evenings for just family. Sometimes we end up at a basketball game or some other activity, but we do it together as a family. Most often however, we are at home. Sometimes we play games, sometimes we watch movies, sometimes we go for a drive together, sometimes we just sit around and talk. Often, we have a gospel discussion, even if it is briefly. But making sure that time is taken together, without outside distractions. In some ways I think this one is the most important one.

Those are some of the things that we enjoy doing as a family, and things that we have made sure we strive to do with our kids. Some might call them traditions, and in a lot of respects they are. Good traditions are also a great way to keep families together, long after they have each moved on and started their own families. But, however you do it, family bonds are the most important, and the easiest to keep if we put forth the effort. I hope you take time today to make or keep your family bonds strong. What are some traditions you have in your family that help keep your family together?

Temple

Several months ago I had the opportunity to go to the Cedar City, Utah Temple with my oldest daughter. The temples for my Church (The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints) are sacred buildings for us. We perform ordinances and make covenants with the Lord within these temples, and you cannot enter yourself until you are at least 18 years of age. Often people enter just before they leave on their missions, or just before getting married and sealed as a couple. Our temples have been closed the last year due to Covid, but started opening up on a limited basis at the end of 2020. My daughter was preparing for her mission, and was in Cedar City as she had been attending college. My parents are temple workers, so she was able to schedule the session with them as the workers, and she was able to invite only 17 people to attend with her because of the Covid restrictions, so most of the people in attendance were family, the rest were close friends. I was able to fly down that morning, and escort her through for her first time that evening. It was an awesome experience, and brought back so many sweet memories from when I went through just before getting married. It was a wonderful evening, and I am grateful for the spiritual strength that comes from going to the temple.

But, it was also hectic in a way. I had spent the night on several airplanes getting there, then the 3 hour drive from the airport. It had been a long 36 hours by the time we got there that evening, and I was really focused on helping her have a great experience and not be worried as she went along. It was also a great reunion with my family as well, as everyone had been busy earlier in the day, so it was the first time I had seen most of them. The next few days were a whirlwind of activity, and then I got on an airplane and left to go home. It was a wonderful trip, lots of memories, but I didn’t really take the time to reflect back on exactly what had happened.

Last night I was able to attend again, this time with one of my daughters best friends and their family in the Anchorage, Alaska Temple. She is leaving on her mission as well. It was so interesting to see things from almost an “outside looking in” perspective as I was able to sit back and watch this wonderful mom helping her amazing daughter the same way I had helped mine. I was able to finally sit back and reflect a little bit on that night in April, to really think about and appreciate the experience. I remembered the instructions, the excitement, the nervousness that she had before hand. I remember the family and the opportunity we had to have most of us together in the same room for the same purpose. I remember seeing my daughter, not just as my daughter, but a future missionary, a future wife and mother, a daughter of God, one who can and will change the world around her.

There was a spirit of understanding last night, a spirit of gratitude. It was almost overwhelming several times throughout the evening, and continues to be so today as I reflect on both of these evenings and the great opportunity that it was to be in those temples on those days, with those people, some who are literal family, and some who are family by choice. I am grateful for the temples of my Church and for eternal families. I am grateful that the Lord gives us these opportunities to experience again, often from a different perspective, so that we have that chance to reflect back. Sometimes it’s to learn, sometimes it’s to experience again and remember, sometimes to see things more deeply or experience from that new perspective. Often it is a combination of many reasons. Today I am grateful to reflect and feel just a little bit deeper the love that my Heavenly Father has for me and my family, and the love He has for all His children. I hope you can see His hand in your life and that you can reflect more deeply on the love that He has for you.

Beliefs

I have many beliefs, just as we all do, and I thought the other day, I haven’t really shared what I believe with my readers. So today I thought I would share a few of those with you so you can get to know me. I would love to hear your beliefs as well. I think sharing those ideas with others helps us get to know each other, to see where we are coming from, and it’s easier to respect others and their perspectives, even when we don’t agree with them, when we know where they are coming from.

I believe in God. I believe He is my Heavenly Father, and that I am His literal daughter. I believe that we have Heavenly Parents who love us deeply. More than we can comprehend in this life. Through my lifetime here on earth I have also learned that my Heavenly Father is in the details of my life. Not just the details, but the details of the details of my life. I know that I was placed here to learn and grow, and He orchestrates things so that I have the optimum chance of doing just that, even though life is hard, we weren’t placed here for an easy ride. Growth doesn’t come in ease. I know that He is concerned about me, and that He loves me unconditionally, although I know that my behavior can disappoint Him at times, but I’m grateful He has never given up on me, but continues to give me opportunity to change and do better.

I believe in Jesus Christ. I know He is my Savior and that He loves me dearly as well. I know that He is not a vindictive person. I know that He wants the best for me, and that no matter what, He never leaves my side. I can go the wrong way, and make mistakes, but as soon as I turn around, He is there waiting to help me back. I am so very grateful for the Atonement of Jesus Christ and for the opportunity that allows all of us to repent and change. I am grateful for the opportunity to repent, to learn, and to grow on a daily basis, and I hope that I give others that same opportunity to become better, rather than judging and holding people back. I am grateful that eternity, and the opportunity to live with my Heavenly Father and my Savior is possible, because of Him.

I believe in the Holy Ghost, and I know that through His influence I have been guided so many times in my life. I am grateful that He is a constant companion, and can help me feel, know, and understand the will of my Heavenly Father and my Savior, as well as to feel deep inside me their love for me. I believe that they are 3 separate beings, working united in purpose to help us return to them at the end of our mortal lives, and that everything they do is to draw us closer to them, in love, long-suffering, help, chastening even, so that we can become better, become who we were meant to be, and ultimately get back home.

I believe in families. They are central to God’s plan, not only in the opportunity to bring other children to earth, but in the raising of families. As parents we have the opportunity to work side by side with our Heavenly Father in teaching and nurturing our children. This also blesses us with the unique opportunity to understand a small part of how He feels for us as our parent, realize how much He loves us, and also realize how patient He really is with us. I believe that the ideal family starts with a Dad and Mom, and that gender is essential to God’s plan. I believe that families can be together beyond the grave, and that family life began long before we arrived on earth and will continue long after our time here on earth has ended.

These beliefs govern my life. They are intertwined and inseparable from who I am, they make up the fabric of who I am. I am not perfect by any means, and I slip up daily. But every day I strive to be better, and I strive to be true to who I am and the beliefs I have. I do not think that anyone can separate their beliefs from who they are, and that if they can, they really don’t believe what they say they do. I believe that our actions and words tell others what we truly believe and what we truly are. But I also believe that anyone can change. Good or bad, we are changing every day, and we have the opportunity to become better if we so choose. I also believe that it’s best to give others the benefit of the doubt, because we don’t know what has led them to where they are, and we don’t usually know how far they may have come. I believe kindness is the best policy. You will rarely be wrong when you are kind.