I am the type of person who doesn’t rely on other people. At least not at first. I don’t know if it’s because I’ve been burned enough that I don’t trust people will follow through, or if I am just not a very trusting person.

I think part of it is, as a mother, I’ve always been the one relied upon to keep the schedule, know the stuff, have a handle on everything that is happening, etc. But, I also know that over the years, when I have relied on people, sometimes they really don’t come through. I have probably been that person for someone else who was trusted to do something and didn’t get it done.

The last few years however, I have been learning that most people are more reliable than I give them credit.

I have had the opportunity to be in charge of many different types of activities over the years, through my community and through my Church. I have organized many events and sat in meetings with many, many capable people.

One of my current responsibilities is that of an assistant shift coordinator in the Anchorage, Alaska Temple. We have a small temple, but in order for the work to get accomplished on our 3 hour shift, we need at least 12 women (I don’t know how many the men need). That is 12 women whom I initially did not know. 12 people who I had no idea what their idea of reliability was.

This stressed me out. Scheduling other people’s time and then trusting that they would show up and do their job was scary, because every single job was important.

They all came. Occasionally weather has impeded people coming, but not their desire to be there. I have had weather impede my ability to get there as well, and left others scrambling. But, it is the Lord’s work and He takes care of it if we have put forth the time to get it organized and done all we can to take care of it.

I am in charge of a 5K fun run for my library. I have asked for help, and the people from the library board and library staff who have volunteered have always come through and assisted.

What have I learned through it all?

First, I have learned to schedule for my own time first. Commit only to what I am sure I can accomplish. This makes me a better asset to others needing help. Say no when I can’t help so that they can find someone else for that job. Don’t volunteer unless I am committed to getting the job done.

Second, I have learned to give people a chance. Sometimes people don’t follow through, sometimes there’s a reason, sometimes not. But I can at least give them an opportunity. If it’s hard, give them a small responsibility, but give others a chance none the less.

Third, I can give people more chances. This one is hard. Sometimes something legitimate really does come up and a reliable person has to back out at the last minute. Also, we all learn and grow. I’ve found that young adults, while well meaning, are sometimes less reliable than people as they age. Not because they don’t want to be reliable, and not because there’s not potential there, but because they just haven’t had enough experience organizing yet, seeing the importance of following through.

Doing it all by myself has always been the easiest thing for me. But, I’ve learned that I can’t do it all by myself all the time. I’ve learned that having help makes most thing easier, many hands makes light work. I’ve also learned that having others there builds bonds and friendships that might otherwise never have occurred, and this one has enriched my life immensely.

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