One of the prompts for today on my blog was the question: “What lesson do I wish I had learned earlier in life?” This is something I’ve actually thought about over the years, something my kids have joked about, and something that recently, learning to manage time better, I have really understood how to do better, and that is to slow down and enjoy each day.

When my kids were little I used to be so scheduled, especially when they started school. Imagine, kindergarten and thinking I had a lot to schedule back then. The farther my kids got in school, and the more of them that went, the more scheduling and doing we did. I homeschooled each one of my kids through middle school and then they went back to public school for high school.

I remember a friend of mine asking one time if I had a specific time available to help with something. I pulled out my phone to look at my calendar. Her kids were still elementary aged and I had elementary through high school age kids. She saw all the colors on all the days for the whole month, and she asked me if they represented things I had going on. I said yes and she just looked in disbelief. At the time I was proud of myself for managing so many things all the time. Now, I might be disappointed with my lack of time management and inability to say no sometimes.

We live a fair distance from all the schools my kids have attended except elementary. One day when my oldest was a junior or senior, I realized one of my favorite parts of her high school basketball was the car rides to and from the games. I enjoyed watching her play, don’t get me wrong. But I also usually spent time helping in the concession stands or with the tickets, or whatever might come up while we were there. But the car rides, often with just her and I, were quiet. She could talk about whatever, and usually didn’t give me much of a chance to interject, but I could sit in that car for hours and let her just talk. That is where I found my peace.

As my kids have gotten older I have also realized the value of not doing quite so much. When they were little I enrolled them in every activity, sometimes even if they didn’t want to participate, because I thought they should at least try it. Some activities they ended up loving, others they didn’t, and I think there is value in getting out and trying new things. But, if I’ve learned anything over the years it’s that there is real value in slowing down a little bit, don’t force the schedules, don’t sign up and say yes to everything that comes our way. Our time is valuable.

Ultimately, especially recently, I have learned that my time is worth more than some activities, my family is worth more than trying to do and be everything for everyone. If I could go back, I would focus more on being present for my kids, not that I wasn’t for the most part, and not that they disliked all the activities we participated in, but I think looking back, I would be more selective in what we did, and then spend more time together away from the world, and that includes electronics.